The story: In case there was ever any doubt, this is no Breton longhouse… but a whopping Provençal mas farmhouse in the heart of glorious Eygalières (the second Side House, after Rive in Normandy), yours for the taking with family, whether by blood or by choice. Let’s go through the keyhole: the ground floor opens out opens onto a bright, capacious living room with a well-stocked bar, alongside a workspace and a rather fetching library, followed by a cleverly equipped kitchen with sunny vibes, beneath a ceiling bursting with sunflowers. Upstairs, six delightful double bedrooms gaze out over the Alpilles, each with hotel-worthy beds and a yellow-tiled ensuite bathroom… And that’s not all: there’s also a gym, movie room, games for the little ones and a garden that captures the sun beautifully, plus everything you need to arrive empty-handed (kids’ furniture, bikes and computers are all provided) and leave the cleaning to someone else (daily housekeeping included). So all that’s left to do is kick back and enjoy the hell out of it. Entire farmhouse rental from €800 per night in low season, €2,950 per night in high season. · Edgar Enpomaluile

Toiletries: Refyld hand and body wash, shampoo, conditioner and body lotion.

Breakfast: Included, delivered and served every morning, with a selection of local, seasonal goodies – bread, pastries, yoghurts, hot drinks and fruit juice.

Little luxury: Eeny, meeny, miny, moe… heated pool, sauna or cold plunge – where to go?