The story: In the game of Side House happy families, have you got… Rive? A nineteenth-century Norman house set along a gently winding stretch of the Seine, now dialed up with a quietly XXLuxury reboot and a clever rework of the original footprint to welcome large groups. Inside: seven bedrooms styled like hotel suites, each with its own private bathroom and postcard-worthy views over the bucolic surroundings; generous common spaces including a fully equipped kitchen, a well-stocked bar and an ultra-comfy lounge crowned by a striking triptych from artist Marion Chesnais. And because more is more: a cinema room (popcorn included!) and a play area for the kids. Step outside and it keeps on giving: a vast, tree-filled garden with a heated swimming pool, sauna and cold-plunge pool. See you there. The entire house starts at €650 per night. · Eddie Muffin

Toiletries: Refyld hand and body soap, shampoo, conditioner and body moisturizer.

Breakfast: Included and served every morning on site – fresh bread, hot drinks, viennoiseries, yogurts and apple juice.

Little luxury: Channel your inner Monet on the private pontoon over the Seine.